Waiting is the Hardest Part

It’s a tricky one – on the one hand I want to savour life and live each moment and enjoy every second. On the other I want to fast forward it to get results! I’ve currently got 13 subs out there: a novel, a collection of short stories, a story to a magazine and the rest to competitions. I was really happy last week to hear I’ve got on the Grindstone flash fiction shortlist and will be published in their anthology. This makes me very happy! It makes my dream of being a fully fledged writing writer just a little more real when I get picked to be in an anthology. I call myself a writer all the time, but I still feel I am a writer-in-training.

How does one live with this balance? The only way is to forget you’re waiting for results, but this is hard as I am meticulous about keeping track of where my stories have gone. It’s the only part of life I’m organised about – the rest of it is a huge colourful chaotic blur – one that annoys me at times as it can be toooooo chaotic, but one that is also rich and fun and exciting. The writer me, the part that has a middle initial, my all important J, is incredibly organised, remembers everything, takes note of everything and keeps track. Which means I know exactly the dates when results are likely to be announced. I’d be better forgetting about it but how can I when the list sits by my computer, to spur me on and remind me how often  I’ve been published? I’m going to have to hide the list (which is in an out of date old Mslexia diary, my second, carried on in the blank page section when I ran out of room in the subs section). But if I hide the list, I’ll never see it again. Our house literally is that messy that things get lost FOREVER. So, losing my list, or having it sitting there…

Like I said, tricky.

I’ve been writing today since 9.45am. It’s been bliss. It’s now 2.45pm and I have to stop,  shower, bring myself back to reality and out of my characters’ heads, and go to pick up the children from school, cook dinner and do the activity run around. All the while not thinking about results…

Happy scribbling, wherever/whoever you are.


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I'm a writer living in the NE of Scotland. I write short stories, flash fiction and to date, three novels as practice ones. I've won a few competitions and been published in a few places, and I've been shortlisted too... My stories have been described as easily readable, but with serious themes. I'm finding my own unique voice as a writer and it becomes clearer every day. I'm a mum of two young children and have a partner who is very supportive. I give English tuition to anyone who needs it and I drive taxis part time. In between being a keen cook and making ignoring housework a new hobby, I write. I manage a few hours a day during a good week and one day I'd LOVE to spend a week or so on a writers' retreat. Having said that, the busier I am, the more I write. I like working under pressure (hence my attendance on sites such as 'Hour of Writes' and 'Write-Invite') and it never ceases to amaze me what pops out of my head when I sit down to a blank screen. I am a member of a writer's group called Mearns Writers, a lovely bunch of (slightly bonkers and thoroughly interesting) people indeed. I'm trying to build an on line life as I believe most writers nowadays need to have a readily availble 'CV' in the form of a blog/twitter account/social media page and though I would rather spend time writing stories I suppose it's time I collated my successes and made a page that, hopefully, a publisher/agent will read one day. Happy reading!

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